Q. What do you call a woman who, after 72 hours of hard labor, finally gives birth? A. Mom.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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What do you call six white guys on a bench? Six white guys at the park

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A Terrorist walks into an airport. - He then blows himself up.

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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Instructions to make origami. 1.) Staple bagels to face 2.) Ask someone else to do it. 3.) Hang yourself because you are too stupid to figure it out yourself

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What did the potato say to the man It said nothing it is a potato

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Yo' mom is so fat, She should probably consider a low fat diet in which no more than 30% of the calories are from fat.

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Roses are reds, Viloets are blue, Thank God I'm a christian, And not a jew.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.It got ran over by a bus.

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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My diick won't stop barking unless I take it for a walk, problem is, I can't find a leash big enough

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I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

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What do you feel inside after eating an entire class of pre-schoolers? A stomach ache

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SEX IS LIKE MATH ADD THE BED SUBTRACT THECLOTHES DIVIDE THE LEGS AND PRAY U DONT MULTIPLY!!!!

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Why was the little boy sad? He was recently molested.

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Q: Have you ever seen Ray Charles wife? A: Nethier has he.

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The Lord told Moses to come forth. He tripped and came fifth.

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How do you get a girls number? Grow some balls and ask for it.

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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Why was Timmy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? BREATH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

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What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops