What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

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Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

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Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

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what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

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Q: What did the Lone Ranger say when he saw his horse coming? A: Here comes my horse.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Nothing. Johnny is Jewish.

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Why was the blonde staring at a container of orange juice? She wanted to make sure that it did not contain any pulp.

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What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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What's worse than waking up with a clown in your bed? Waking up with a dead clown in your bed.

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Q: Why did your mom cross the street? A: Because she was so ugly that she fell off both sides of the bed

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

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What do you call a man that eats a sandwich? Hungry.

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Why did Jimmy drop his Ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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jim is constantly asking bob the same questions, bob brings this to attention and suggests that jim might have amnesia. jim agrees and they move on iwth the conversation. minutes later jim asks a simaler question brought to attention earlier because he has amnesia

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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What succeeds most of the time? The population of a field with grass.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A kind hearted serial killer who will win your heart emotionally and then shoot you to death unexpectedly.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

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My dog poops u pick it up if i poop ill say f@#% you eat it DumbS%^&

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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