A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why was osama bin laden shot and killed? because he was a very violent man and deserved his punishment

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yo momma so fat, the last time she saw 90210 was on the scale!

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the chicken cross the road? ... So he didn't get Mono from Janelle.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

how many baby's does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What come after 69? Time for you to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Did you hear about the sea cow who sang "Part of your Herd?" It was the Little Moomaid.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How many retards does it take to change a lightbulb?? None it is physically impossible

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

thumb_up thumb_down -20

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a gay man got shot outside his house even though he was just checking the male get it checking the male

thumb_up thumb_down -20

I run, but I have no legs. I see, but I have no eyes. What am I? A prospective result of future medical advancements that allow the disabled to live normal, healthy and fulfilling lives.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

why did the baby die ? he fell down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down -20

"You can't get past" "I'll get future" dad cri mom cri boy bang girl girl cri women's rites sholdnt exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

thumb_up thumb_down -20

a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

The sword that kills, the sword that gives life.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cement is grey, Shoes are myriad colors, but usually white, black, or brown, depending on their use, And I love you.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops