When did the War of 1812 begin? 1963.

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roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie Thum thump Who's there Bethany Hamilton

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Your mother is so stupid that she has lived a very unfulfilling life due to her lack of education.

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Yo mommas so fat that when she walked into the ocean all the whales were far away. However, if the whales did happen to be closer to your mom it would be highly improbable that they would sing.

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What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Why is the redneck crying? They died of diabeetus.

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Q. What is the worlds biggest lie A. I have read and agree to the terms of service ?

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Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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Why didn't the guy have kids? He didn't want them

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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Q: What is scarier than the boogie man? A: Herpes

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European on my shoes, buddy.

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What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Whats worse than passing out drunk and having your friends draw on your face? When you die of alcohol poisoning in the morning

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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When Chuck Norris does a push up, he's working out.

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What did little Timmy do in the Library? Read

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Three cows are sitting in a field The first cow says, "MOOOO!" The second cow says, "MOOOO!" The third cow says, "MOOOO!"

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Daddy drinks, Because you cry.

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pady irish man paddy english man and paddy african man go on a magic slide wat ever you say will be at the bottem paddy irish man said gold paddy english man silver paddy african man almost fell off so he said shit buthalf way down he thought it was fun so he said wee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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