Dogta I don got da aids yeah? Well Sigh... Man I am so sorry, I got the positive, and the uh.. Good news... Whats the good news? I hate you! Whats the positive news? You dont have teh aids.

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A guy has spikey things in his butt, what happened?............... He fell on a cactus.

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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And Stephen Hawking said.

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What is better than getting a job? Getting a better job.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? You eat them.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She didn't own a car.

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Why did Brooke go to the bathroom? She had to pee

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I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

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Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

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Terminator XXXIVXXX Regensisysydioniosis. Watch as the terminators return in this year`s summer blockbuster, they return to a time before the birth of Connors grandfather and manage to destroy the world, then the only decision left is for humanity in another timeline to travel back as the terminators are destroyed, but they travel back again so that! But that wont happen before Terminator: Los Pollos Hermanos.

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Knock knock. who's there? Banana. Banana Who? Knock KNOCK!!! WHO IS THERE!!! BANANA!!!! BANANA WHOOOOO!!! Banana Johnson....... I'M YOUR NEIGHBOR!!!!

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A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: I got NoEyeDeer!!!

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A blind man cant see this joke, so I probably shouldnt write it..

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I once went to a Haitian party, yea.. The DJ really brought the house down.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why did Chuck Norris fall of the cliff? Because he was pushed.

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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Penis

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why did the white guy go to a black mans yard sale? to get his stuff back

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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Billy wanted a pet...and now he got cancer...

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Your momma has such a bad pancreas that it releases insulin into her bloodstream all the time. NOT just in response to glucose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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