Why did the Muslim man burn the American flag? The flag had touched the ground, which, by tradition, means it has to be disposed. And the proper way of disposing it is by burning.

Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

When life hands you lemons you can't make lemonade, Sugar and Water are two other key ingredients that were not included with the lemons.

My favorite word starts with F and ends with U-C-K! My favorite word is FIRETRUCK! What'd you think I'd say? My favorite thing starts with P and ends with O-R-N! My favorite thing is POPCORN! What'd you think I'd say?

What's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings. Now hats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Three bee stings.

A baby crawls into a bar. He cannot walk.

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

What do you call somebody who can't walk? Handicapped

Why did the sailor fall off the boat? Because vampires arent real.

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

What's the difference between a gay and a homo?...........WTF I DON'T KNOW!?!?!?!?

Why are a black man's eyes always bloodshot red after having sex? Pepper spray.

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

A man died in a sky-diving accident. What was the last thing that went through his mind before he died? His feet

knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead

roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

nick and a mexican were in a falling plane.. nick ate the mexican... that is all..

justin beiber sucks

Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There must have been something that peaked her interest.

Why did the man steal the little girl? He didn't. She was his daughter and they were driving home after picking up the groceries.

why can't dead peaple have sex? because they're dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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