How do you get a guitar player to play softer? Ask him to lower the volume a bit and maybe also play a quieter tune.

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Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

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whats big and white and falls from the sky\ Refrigerator

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What can I say, besides, the media is fighting one another now, people do have more freedom, religion is losing the grip on people, and yeah the world may be a bit grim right now, but people have chosen their own direction in life, and that is going wherever the most corrupt ones in society tell them to. And that was never different, I am not saying that you are not doing a good job, I am saying that the underground society failed, we where idealists, then we where branded criminals, without a shred of proof, I have not lost myself, and you have not lost you, why save the rest from what they enjoy?

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder and help him down

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If a tree falls on a woman, and no one is around to hear it, what is a tree doing in the kitchen?

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Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

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What does a sailboad and a walrus have in common? Nothing.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

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Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

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Yo mama's so fat because her BMI is considered obese on the scale.

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Hey, guess what. What? ... Hello? Sorry, I don't talk to strangers.

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what did the man do when he was at the end of his rope? he bought more rope.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

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Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

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What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

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A Korean, a Japanese, a Muslim, a Christian, a Jew, a Chinese and a member of Isis are enjoying a friendly game of poker. The Korean man kills everyone because he has a life threatening illness that prevents him from using his brain. The worst news though was that the he lost the game of poker.

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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Q: Why did the irishman walk into the bar A: Because he wanted a drink

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So an alien walks into a bar......... and everyone runs away secreaming because theres an alien in the bar.

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What did the cover say when it fell off the bed? Oh sheet!

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A chicken decides to cross a road. Unfortunately it gets ran over and does. The end.

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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