How do you stop a car from crashing into a wall? -You can't, you are welcome to try, but please don't.

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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Whats white and sticky? Marshmellows

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how many black men did it take to steal from the whitehouse? Obama.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, my name is cartman, kyle you're a jew

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What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

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whats the difference between a ferrari in my garage, and a pile of dead babies in my garage. I do not have a ferrari but i do have a pile of dead babies

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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What do you get when you cross a bus full of cancer patients and a train full of children? A very sad train accident.

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why did the golfer ware two ares of paents. if he got a hole in one

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Why Did the man Commit suicide? His body used cellular respiration to make ATP (A form of energy) and his body used it to send electrical signals to his index finger to pull the trigger on his .357 Magnum, thus putting a bullet through the soft tissue in his brain causing his body to shut down Imediately!

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Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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AIDS

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

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What's green and has wheels? The Holocaust. I lied about everything.

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What do you get when a man farts then a giraffe digests the gas and then poops into the mouth of a rabid baby raccoon? A raisin coated in corn flakes with digestive fluid sauce.

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What did Osama Bin Laden say to his barber? ????? ??? ?????? ??? ?????, which, in their native language means, I would like to get a haircut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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