What do you give a sick bird? Tweetment.

A blond, brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They find a genie, who tells them each one can have one wish. They all wish for the same thing, to be back home with their families.

What did Jay Z say to his long lost friends? Allow me to reintroduce myself, my names Jay - Z

A redhead walks into a bar and goes to the restroom. She needed to pee.

poop.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I LIKE TITS TITS

Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

What kind of shots does John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

what do u call a black guy who sells drugs a pharmacist

Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

q. what did batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile a. hey robin get in the bat mobile

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

A: I slept in your mums bed last night. B: don't care dad

Chuck Norris doesn't just have a chin underneath his beard. He also has part of his neck underneath his beard.

Whats the difference between a falcon and a deer? both live in water, except for the falcon... oh, and the deer.

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

Did u think that last joke was funny? Well this one isnt

A black guy goes to the bar. The Barman say: What would you like to drink?

Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

Why was johnny so good at reading? Because he had 3. Toes

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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