Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - I lied, it was a goat.

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A blonde is locked in a super-market. She dies.

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In Soviet Russia, this joke is an anti-joke.

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Why did the car get sucked up by the tornado? Because it was in Pilger, Nebraska.

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how many jews does it take for me to be able to have sex with my cousin's girlfriend? idk, but that's how many I need. actually let me have some extras. couldn't hurt.

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What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No Idear. What do you call a deer with no legs or no eyes? Still no idear.

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Q: What's very loud, has 60 wheels, and is covered in snow? A: A massive car pile up in January that was caused by a women being distracted while Texting. 7 people were killed.

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CUT MY SOUL INTO PIECES MY NAME IS VOLDEMORT TERMINATION YOU'RE BLEEDING DON'T GIVE A F**K IF I HAVE NO NOSE FOR BREATHING

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If You Bend Over Some More I'll Eat That Booty Too

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I like my coffee like my women, without a penis

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have altzeimer's, Cheese on toast

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Why did the elephant cross the road? Indiana Jones was riding on it to Pankot Palace

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Why did Billy stop playing baseball? He lost his legs to cancer. Poor Billy.

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How did the hot blonde get a promotion from her boss? She worked really hard and achieved more thaan her coworkers.

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Dora the explorer went on an adventure. sadly, all of the animals in the forest, including boots the monkey and swiper the fox, kill her as a sacrifice to an unknown God

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What did the Apostle John say to Jesus of Nazareth? "Oh, blow it out your butthole."

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FUCK THE JEWS

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What is grey and cannot fly? A parking lot.

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Girl: What is your phone number? Guy: 1-800-Choke-Dat-Ho

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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