Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

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why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Knock Knock Come in

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Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

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A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

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A woman is carried out of a bar.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

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A duck walks into a bar and is immediately shot to prevent the spread of bird flu.

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What did the PC say to the Mac? Nothing you idiot! Computers can't talk.

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yo mama is so fat, when she stepped on the scale it said, 200 l.b.s

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Q. What did the monkey say to his little brother? A. Nothing. Monkeys are physically incapable of speaking, therefore it is impossible for them to communicate using the human language.

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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What did the little Jew boy get for Christmas? nothing he is a Jew, he doesn't celebrate Christmas.

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What do a squirrel and a grape have in common? They are both purple except for the squirrel.

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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