A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

what do you get when you cross a dinosaur and a spaceship? a dinosaur spaceship

WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey!!!" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I got a brother. He's bigger then you.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

What do you do with a baby with a broken jaw? Deepthroat.

Whats black, and chrispy inside...? A black guy with bonecancer

What did the asian kid do before he got a blood test? He studied.

What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

Why did the black guy have a nice sterio? He has a well paying job and decided to treat himself.

Q: Hey, ask me if I'm a tree. ".. Are you a tree?" A: No.

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

Three men walk into a gay bar, and have a great time because they're all of consensual age and brought condoms for safe sex.

Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

How does Michael J. Fox mix his paint? He uses the paint mixing stick that is provided, for free, by most reputable hardware stores.

A man walks up to a girl and says "Hello there" The girl doesn't respond because she has been deaf and blind for her entire life and doesn't know he is there. Potatoes.

Why did the hobo get hit by a bus? He wanted to kill himself.

Why couldn't the Asian man satisfy a woman? He was in a coma.

What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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