Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt it got hit by a truck before it got to the other side.

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Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

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what is the only thing in the world that can pick up 1000 jews at once? A vacuum cleaner

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How long does it take to paint a house with babies? It matters how hard you throw them.

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Dad, if I say shit or somethin... Dad: FALCOWN PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANCH!

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A guy walks in to a bar and says to the bartender "I'm fed up with all these 'guy walks into a bar' jokes on anti-joke. The bartender says "I have no idea what you're talking about".

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A princess decided to kiss a frog in the hopes that it would turn into a handsome prince, as she found none of her suitors to her taste. The frog was incredibly poisonous and she died of total organ failure three days later.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am colorblind I hate my life

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

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''Today is Star Wars day :)'' ''Why's that?'' ''guess'' ''I don't know :/'' ''It's May the 4th!'' ''And?'' ''May the 4th be with you :p''

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If a wood chuck could chuck wood, it would depend on whether it wanted to or not. If it did want to, it could potentially chuck an infinite amount of wood in its lifetime

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A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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bangers and mash?

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Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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A dog walks into a club. Just kidding I hit the dog with a club multiple times, killed it, and went to jail for the murder of an innocent animal.

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Hey man. what? squidbillies.

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What is more annoying then finding a worm in your apple you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops