Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

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Why couldn't Johnny drive? He doesn't have arms or legs. Why didn't Johnny have arms or legs? Johnny is a potato

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How do you make a drug dealer cry? Just say no

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What's the only part of a vegetable you cant eat? The wheelchair

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When does the ice cream get thrown at the yellow horse on thursday evening? Purple Monkey Rainbow

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What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

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What is red and hangs around the back of a train? A miscarriage.

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

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How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

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What did nearly headless nick say when he became headless nick. Nothing because he doesnt have a head

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hi michael

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Two blonds walk into a bar, the brunette ducked

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Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar

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Why did the toddler fall over? He's an Iraqi child and has been shot in both legs, being readied for a public execution for fighting on the opposing side.

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Why didnt the guy eat cereal? Cause he didnt have any

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

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There are a fox and a chicken and the fox eats the chicken.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Have you seen Whitney Houston's new house? Neither has she.

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How do Chinese parents name their children? With deep thought and consideration about a thoughtful, respectful and honorable name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops