What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

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I really want to know something would all of you like to go on Suspension for 3 weeks? Mr Goodwin

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a doorstep? A: Matt.

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8===D

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I get more excited then my dog when I give her a treat

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What do you think would happen if there was a zombie apocalypse? You would just die.

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Hey look, I found a fire hydrant!

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A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

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What do you call Bob if he gets a nose ring? Bob

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Your sex life.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

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Are you from Jamaica? 'Cause you're making me crazy! Are you from Haiti? I'm really sorry about all the disaster that's been happening there.

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What did the lady with Alzheimer's do yesterday She can't remember

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Why is there trees? Because they change color... Oh yeah and for oxygen by Burflared

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Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words are merely the smallest element of language capable of containing meaning and isolation and, as such could never directly produce the 4,000 Newtons of force per square centimetre required to break bones.

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how much fish could a chicken

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Yo momma so fat she's obese.

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Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

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I got put through anger management when I was a child it made me mad.

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Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops