Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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How do you make a health inspector give you a good report? Throw his family into a pack of alligators.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Ruff, hi, ruff ruff, we are both dogs ruff ruff, ruff ruff, ruff!!

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2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

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A bear walks into a bar..... The bartender asks " what do you want?" , he gets killed by the bear because he started talking to it Made by eli

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here's a chuck norris fact: Chuck Norris is 5'10 and lost to bruce lee!

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whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being hit by a plane.

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A gay man takes another gay man home after a wild night at the city's top club. They choose to be safe and not have gay sex.

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Why do women have boobs? In order to feed their infants

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Q: How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One

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Why did the Egg turn Purple Because it didnt turn blue.

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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Q: What do you call a black person who got hit by a truck? A: Dead

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Why did Justin Bieber bieber his bieber? Because Bieber biebers his bieber when his bieber need a bieber bieber. BIEBER

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The queen having a shit

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What do you call a KKK member? ...racist

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing???? she had down syndrome

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What do you call a black police officer? The drug dealer's inside man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops