When life throws you lemons, you probably have dyslexia

thumb_up thumb_down -21

a gay man got shot outside his house even though he was just checking the male get it checking the male

thumb_up thumb_down -21

why did the baby die ? he fell down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Regarding the "I will violate you, your children and your parent if you thumb me red" comment belo. I had a green thumb, I know because I gave it to myself because I am awesome... Now I got none... I person that this this, I cannot wait to X-mas where I will be violating them all, tell them, and as thus remind you that this was their Christmas present from you... Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: Yes, I am your neigbor... I cant wait for slot number 24 on my christmas calendar... There is a picture of you and your family... Yummy!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A rooster lays an egg on top of a henhouse. Which way does the egg fall? Roosters don't lay eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Lets just say I work for some important people, not the feds that is for sure, ill tell you when we meet, not here. As for my condition, lets just say that I am profusely bleeding noseblood now and that is because I forgot to take my medication, and if I had no medicaions at all, I would have begun bleeding out of me ears end eye sockets, and ironically id die from a lot of other shit before bleeding to death, so thats not even the case. Its nothing common, but I bet people could find out about it pretty fast on wikipedia, and as much as I like throwing shit on random people here, I dont like bothering anyone with my problems, in this case, it came kinda sudden and unexpected, and I dont mind sharing my deepest aspects including this with my best friends, of which one of them you clearly are love.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Like this if you have a big diick like me Dislike if you have a baby diick Ignore if you're a girl and get back in the kitchen

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many black men can you fit into a mini? Five One in the drivers seat. One in the passenger seat. And three in the back seats. Anymore would be both dangerous and impractical due to the small interior volume of the car, and it would also put a significant strain on the cars limited engine power. Especially when tackling a steep incline.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

John: Knock Knock! Bill: Who's there John: John Bill: Oh hey John, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -21

An elderly lady walks into a grocery store, and nothing of a great significance happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? -None, they will pay for somebody else to do it

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Blonde: Hey, what does "Idk" mean? Blonde's friend: "I don't know" Blonde: Thank you for telling me, that has been bothering me for quite some time now.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the girl scream at old people? She had turrets. www.youtube.com/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why are you a chicken? Because I say cock-a-doodle doo

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Hi, this is Luke. Luke, I am your father. I burned my father's body after he died saving my life on a large space station. You're not my father, stop calling.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ GONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZGONZALEZ

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops