How do u make a plumer cry? You kill his family!

A bass player walks past a bar. What? It could happen.

What's worse than pushing a baby off a cliff?........ Standing at the bottom with a pitchfork....!

Why didn't Bill go to the party? He wasn't invited.

What did Lil Jimmi received at his birthday ? A red fire truck and he loved it

How did the little boy break his arm? He was trampleed by elephants.

Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

What did the priest say to the child.... nothing he just gripped his arm tightly and pulled down his pant

Why did the milkman wear a white belt? To keep his pants up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was dead and therefore unable to escape the Chick fil A bag it was being carried in.

So an asian man gets into a car... and drives home on the highway driving at the approximate speed of the designated speed limit while exhibiting safe driving maneuvers. He arrives home to his wife and kids and sits down for a nice dinner while having a engaging conversation about the political future of the United States and his favorite football team.

Arrow to the Knee

What's sad about a house on fire?, it was my house.

Why was the gay kid made fun of........... because he was homosexual who was struggling in life

Two penguins are sitting in a bathtub. One looks at the other and says, "Can you pass the soap?" The other penguin says, "What do i look like, a typewriter?"

Knock knock. Who's there? Get in the van, or I'll kill you.

Your mother is so fat.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was black.

what do you call a man with a mop? a janitor.

whats worse then falling on the ice? -getting raped by a blue whale

Knock, knock. Who's there? Warenth Gibson. Warenth Gibson who? Warenth Gibson. What part of that don't you get?

A guy who's father of eight children, married to a wonderful woman for fifty years, he likes pizza and spaghetti, he smokes cigars occasionally, he also exercises : He runs around the block every other day. He's the manager of a pizza shop and he's living in a two-floor house he calls his home... Nothing really funny happens to this guy, but that's got to be the most detailed character background in a joke ever.

if a black man, a Chinese man, and an Indian were about to jump off the Eiffel tower, who would hit the ground first? who cares?

Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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