What's funnier than cancer? Just about anything. There's nothing funny about terminal illnesses.

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What do you call an attractive woman in a blender? A very rare occurrence.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? jhdfsuigtreyuiertfguiryhg

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One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

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The Holocaust is worse than any number of bee stings. Unless, of course, bees separated people of certain ethnic backgrounds from their families and killed them off bit by bit by stinging them.

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How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

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q; whats small and high pitched a; rory johnston

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Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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They say you are what you eat, but i don't remember eating a big bowl of sexy.

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

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Why was the teenage girl bleeding from her vagina? Because I had shot her in her vagina with my gun earlier that day.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

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If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

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What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

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A black man from Harlem walked in to a store. He then proceeded to buy a few items using money he had earlier procured by working dilligently.

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These jokes don't have punchlines.

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

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If there are 50 bricks on an airplane, and 3 fall off, how many are left? It does not matter how many are left, however, the 3 falling bricks pose a serious safety threat and more should have occurred to properly secure the bricks from falling from the aircraft.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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