Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except for the cases when you die...then you are dead.

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What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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What did Helen Keller say to her friend? Nothing. If you didn't know, she was deaf and blind so she had to use Sign Language.

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A neutron walked into a bar and asked "how much for a drink?" The bartender did not reply because a neutron is so small he didn't notice that it even entered.

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hey hey hey wanna hear a joke.....................................MENS IQ!!!!!!

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Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

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When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in life's eyes. Then life won't trust you with lemons.

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Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

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I like it it the butt -Tyler James Nehring call me 863-670-1547

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A paralysed man falls over.

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Why did the little girl drop her ball? Because she was done playing with it.

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what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

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what is worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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Two scientists are working in a lab. The first one asks, "Do you want some sodium?" The second one pours acid into the first one's eyes.

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What's Michael J Fox's favorite toy? While, a magic 8-ball might first appear to be a good guess. Let's be honest, those things really lose their luster after the first couple times. More likely it's something like a sports car or big screen television.

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Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

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Committing Suicide #YOLO

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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