what has two eyes and a face? the 5 year old who got raped on his way back home last night.

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy, but GET IN THE VAN

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what goes woof ? A dog.

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what you say to the kid that just hit puberty? your a young man

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Whats the difference between a prostitute and crack dealer? One sells addicting drugs, while the other exploits her vagina for money. Either way, they're both illegal.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?".

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

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What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

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MAKE TEA NOT WAR!

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Why couldn't the boy watch the R-rated movie? Cuz he was blind.

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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what do you call a dog with not legs? it doesn't matter what you call it, its not coming

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6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

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A dancer walks into a barre

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How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

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You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

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Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

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How many Jews can you fit into a car? Depending on the size of the car, you should be able to safely fit somewhere between 2 and 8.

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What do you call a person with disabilities? Names.

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a woman gives birth at the hospital in china and then the doctor comes in and says doctor- i have good news and bad news for your baby mother-what is it doctor- bad or good mother-bad doctor-the bad news is that the baby is a girl and the good news is that your baby has cancer

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What's the difference between Elisabeth Fritzl and Pope John Paul II? Pope John Paul II wasn't imprisoned and raped continuously over a 24 year period in a horrific act of cruelty by his father

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How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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