Q: How do mentally retarted people read books A: They dont

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The global news

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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What happened to the man taking a shit? An unfortunate drop of water splashed back onto his arse

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

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What's funnier than a dead baby? -A dead baby sitting next to a kid with Down Syndrome.

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my throat Really started to hurt, like reallly badly, and i remember On sponge bob, he laughed so much his laugh box broke. well, my throat really hurts. please help! can i get my laugh box back? will i never be able to laugh again and have to get it replaced like squidward did?!!? please answer, i have a friend who would probably give me part of her laugh box, but she Laughs like a hyena

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What did the monkey say to the garbage collector? Eiiiiijajajaajaja

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a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

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what did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, They just waved.

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what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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Why did Teresa fall off the swing? She had no arms. Who is knocking at the door? Not Teresa.

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The biggest lie ever. "I do" -Kim Kardashian

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. We are here to inform you that your daughter has died in a drunk driving accident.

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A chicken and a horse go into a bar due to an imperative of an earlier joke, they notice that there are flowers on the bar. The flowers are red and blue. They wonder what they could be.

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Your mom is so poor that her boobs are real.

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What did Shaggy say to Scooby before they got in the Mystery Machine? Scooby, get in the Mystery Machine.

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

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How do you drown a blonde? Same as anyone else. Tie three-hundred cinder blocks to her and drop her into a lake.

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Q: Why does the blonde have the biggest tits in the third grade? A: Because she's 21

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Q: John eats 50 cany bars, eats 45, how many does he have now? A: Diabetes

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What is funny? Your football official having a heart attack

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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