Bill: Knock, Knock. Sean: Who's there? Bill: It's your neighbor, Bill Walters, from across the street. Sean: Oh, hey Bill, how are you and Margie? Bill: Oh, I'm doing fine, but Margie just got out of the hospital for a broken arm. Sean: My gosh, what happened. Bill: She was just loading the Halloween decorations down from the attic while I wasn't home and fell. She's fine though; it was only a minor fracture. Sean: Well thank goodness she alright. Bill: Anyway, I came over to return those hedge clippers I borrowed from you last month. Sean: Oh, thank you. How did they work? Bill: Just great once I gave them a coat of oil. It was a big job... I haven't trimmed those bushes in three years. Sean: Yeah, these clippers have belonged to my grandfather, father, and me. Bill: Darn, thats quite amazing, I wish I could get a pair of those, but I doubt they still make them. Sean: I'm pretty confident they don't, but you can borrow these anytime. Bill: Thanks Sean thats very generous of you. Sean: No problem, I almost never use them myself. Well I better get back to Jeanie...I'm helping her make dinner. Bill: Alright, Well thanks again.

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what did little johnny scream at the xbox after he lost a game? god what the hell! Muskcrat143 i told u to cover my back when i had my predator missile! now my covers blown and i lost my killstreak! god u suck so much and Hippo099 why didn't u kill them before they got a killstreak like wtf!!! i told u to use ur semtex cause i had a claymore set down jeez u guys suck i'm leaving.

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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I just met you, And this is crazy. So call me Kony, I stole you're baby.

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Why do black people like kool aid? Why It is a very hydrating and delicious drink

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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How do you get santa to stop delivering presents? Kill your parents.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have 5 fingers. The middle one is for you.

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What's worse than finding a worm in ur Apple? Finding a worm in ur poop

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What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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This isn't funny.

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A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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