Q: So I don't get it. Do women actually like not having penises and testicles? Do they genuinely enjoy it? A: Silly boy. Women ADORE not having penises and testicles. You just can't get your mind around someone having different preferences in anatomy than you.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was osama bin laden

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Q: What has no color, no shape, no size, and was born in your mind? A: The thought you just had about this anti-joke.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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why didn't the boy get his soda Because the cashier shot him

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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Roses are red, violets are blue, i get tired of this shit let's have some grey goose

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

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Roses are red, Wait. Why start this poem when you cant finish it Refrigerator

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm in it Biting into a baby and finding a worm in it

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What's black and breaks your stove when falling from a tree? Your stove

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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Beans, beans the magical fruit. The more you smoke, the blacker your lungs get.

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whats the same about a red crayon and a blue crayon? there both the same color except for the blue one

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete jumped out, who was left? Pete, the boat blew up and instantly killed repeat

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Holy Tulip Answer- Sexy Mofo

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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Nero, you got followers, people that believe in you, ironically maybe a lot less now, that I have been giving them the fake illusion that I am you, why did you never reveal your true self? Is there something wrong with you physically? Something you fear being judged upon? I love and admire your work, and you to be honest, I know you are married and all, but my heart has chosen its path, it cant be helped really, believe me, I have tried. Dont lose hope in yourself, sometimes you have to accept that you are smarter, wiser, more compassionate and vulnerable than the rest, allowing yourself to be a vulnerable person, also shows how strong you are, if you shut it all away in order to become "strong", you know you end up alone and forgotten. I understand why someone such as you loses hope in humanity, but as long as you hold into the hope of you having the wisdom and courage required to stand on your own with pride rather than shame of your strength and individuality as a human being, something ever rarer I concur, then you have the right to consider yourself greater rather than some arrogant jackass, believe me, I know the man I am speaking about.

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What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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