- Anti Joke

One day, a mother was speaking with her daughters. "Mommy," the first one said, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we brought you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second daughter said, "Why did you name me Rose?" ""Because when we brought you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMBWWAAAAGGGH!" the last daughter cried. She was born with severe special needs and is incapable of coherent speech.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes Good. Enjoy your cold drinks.

What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

OMG, THIS ACTUALLY WORKS!! 1. Hold your breath? for 5 minutes. 2. Die

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What do you call a fat man that breaks into your house at 2 a.m. and steals your money and your television? Probably a dumbass, a jackass, a moron, an idiot, or something in that general area.

"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

Why'd Mary fall off her bike? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Mary... O.o

What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

A mormon walked into a bar and realised it was a bar the he leaves

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

What did the flower say to it's friends? I want to kill a Christmas tree.

What's the difference between a bucket of shit and a black guy? -the bucket.

What's black and white, and red all over? Nothing, those two events are mutually exclusive of each other.

What happened to the fish? It drowned

Why did the girl fall from the tree? Gravity.

what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

What do you call a black jew? Overcooked

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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