What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

Stop making 9/11 jokes their just plane unfunny

Why did the blonde get a tattoo of her adress on her arm? She never wanted to forget her great childhood at her family home, and she hoped that she would come back some day.

nobody move, or i'll kill myself, then her!

if any1 wants contact with me, nina, call me on my cell at 879-555-0934 im looking for a short, chubby man with a hungering taste of mexican taste

what did one toilet say to the other toilet? i would love to flush u

This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

What did Sammy get for Christmas? Raped.

Q: Whats the deifference between me and you A: The fact that im the beautiful one -RDV

Yo momma's so hot I raped her and slit her throat afterwards and hid her body in a ditch.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?!, who's there?!!!, ya fucking asshole!!!, and quit knockin on my door!, my windows are fine!"

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

Knock knock. Who's there. Suidi Arabia. Suida Arabia who? Huh? I was too busy loading my weaponry

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Because 6 was registered as a sex offender

Why did the middle-eastern man fly his plane into the Empire State Building? Because he was a bad pilot with an interest in American architecture.

What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the other ____?

Womens rights.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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