why did the cow go to the theater? to see the new movies pick one and have a good time.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

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What did Billy say to Timmy? Timmy! I'm so sorry. *Sniffles* I didn't mean to throw the fork that hard. Rest in peace Timmy...

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What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

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A guy with a severe attention deficit walks into a bar and... oh, look, the sky is pretty... wait, what was I saying ?

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Yo mama is so stupid that her IQ is relatively lower than the average.

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Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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Whats worse than being a jew? Having all of your friends viciously murdered at a party that you weren't invited to.

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what has wheels and runs on gas? a car with feet

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BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD COPENHAGEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Hey babe, do you like water, because I have water.

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So this drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later she has a misscarrage

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

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Jacob Edwards has friends.

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Im gay What about you

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Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

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What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

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Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

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A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops