Q: why did Suzy fall off the swing? A: she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzy.

A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

How many apples do you end up with if your dog is a golden retriever who got raped by a giant scorpion? A jail

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

Jumping out of an airplane without a parachute is a once in a lifetime expeirence.

Why did the chicken go cluck cluck oh baby yeah balloon your mama oops did kangaroo say? I had sex with your wife and stole your car keys.

whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

Why was the white man chosen for the job over the black guy? He had more work experience and was clearly the better suited applicant.

why did the boy scream? because he got shot.

Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

Why was a mother crying at a hospital? Because a bird threw a stick at her five minutes ago.

knock knock whose there open the door open the door who just open the door so i can come inside

whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy there were skid marks in front of the dead dog

If you call a quiz a quizzicle, what do you call a test? A set of questions or problems used as a means of evaluating the abilities, aptitudes, skills, or performance of an individual or group.

How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

why didnt little timmy finish his test he was eaten by a muslim rhino... .

man ur hairline is soooo far back the archaeologists couldn't find it

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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