So there was this cracker sitting on a bench. A pigeon picked it up and flew off. Probably ate it afterwards.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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How do you make a gorilla stop chasing you? You shoot him.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? because if you subtract 6 from 7 only one would survive.

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Q: How many ghetto people does it take to carry a fat gorilla? A: 14

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What's big and gray and can't climb a tree? A parking lot.

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What happens when you spend far too much money in a gambling machine during a solar eclipse on a leap year? You get poor.

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why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer,

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What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the bus? Yellow What color is the kid? Red because he got hit by the bus.

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Ben: Something smells like updog. Jenny: What's updog? Ben: Nothin' much

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A gay man,a black woman,a seven year old child,a liberal,an atheist and an asian walk into a building. A hijacked plane flies into the tower they were in and kills them all on a cold September morning.

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a headache OUCH!

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why wont our kids have time to socialize? because theyll all be too busy trying to find a solution for global warming.

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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how come jenny could not fall asleep? their was a man standing outside her window holding a knife

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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What is a Zebra? Zebras (/?z?br?/ zeb-r? or /?zi?br?/ zee-br?)[1] are several species of African equids (horse family) united by their distinctive black and white stripes. Their stripes come in different patterns, unique to each individual. They are generally social animals that live in small harems to large herds. Unlike their closest relatives, horses and donkeys, zebras have never been truly domesticated.

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One day an irishman walked into a bar. he started to show off his accent when a nicely dressed lady said to him, "are you from ireland?". "AYE" said the irshman. " what part of ireland are you from?" drunk, the irishman replied "uh downtown" then the woman said, " did you come here alone?" then he replied"no i didn't come here a'lone.....DONKEY!!!"

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Knock knock Who's there? To To be continued.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops