EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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What's the difference between a goat and a cherry? You can't put a goat on top of your ice cream.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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An irish man stumbles out of a bar.

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what is more fun than shower time with adele. a mass gang bang with antonia

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A plumber walks into a bar and the bartender says "What will it be?" and the plumber says "no drinks thank you, I'm here to fix the toilet."

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Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

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A cat jumped into a swimming pool It drowned and was cremated.

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What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

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One day... Jack: Good morning Ben: Good morning The End.

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Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

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Why is Jordan Abu Arabian ? Because his mom is!

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Why was the Tyrannosaurus Rex such an aggressive animal? it had short arms so it could not masturbate.

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Dey see me boilin' Dey choppin' God I'm so fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juicy So fresh and juiiiiiiccccy! MR MCCANN

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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ask me if i am a tree. no.

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What do you call a black man standing on top of a church? "Holy-Shit."

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Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

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how many cody's does it take to screw in a lightbulb? impossible he so stupid!!!

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Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

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what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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