If God gives you lemons you find a new God

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It's all Taggart

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What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Afro Circus Ya get the fuk off my property!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? Nothing, chimneys can't talk!

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Q. What goes 100 mph and is green? A. A frog in a blender

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why was the man so good at holding stuff? he was born with 4 arms!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

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What did the mother say when the train hit her? Bad train! We don't hit!

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a schizophrenic And so am I

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Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

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EVERYONE NEEDS TO UNDERSTAND!! DYSLEXICS ARE TEOPLE POO!

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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What did the whale do when he was angry? He beached himself, causing a major ecological disaster and costing the beach community thousands of dollars to return him to the water.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Getting shot.

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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What Do you call two black guys on a bike? A two person bike

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What happened to the twins? 9/11

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Want to hear the story about how I got put in prison? So I have an odd bunch of friends: one of them is Polish and he works at a call centre, the other is a slave trader and his name is Richard. We tend to meet outside our Polish friend's house to speak or to do "business" when need be (I run errands for Richard) and the other day that's where I got asked to kidnap an American. "That's strange" I thought, but nevertheless I went out and took the American from his house and carried him over in a sack over to our meeting place. I handed him over and sneaked off as soon as I could, thinking I was home free. But I wasn't. The police turned up all angry like. There were witnesses. Turns out a bunch of kids saw me giving Dick a Yank next to the telephone Pole.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops