A man serves his wife dinner. She laughes and tells him it tastes funny. He then procedes to tell her that is because he put large amounts of poision into the food.

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Want to hear the story about how I got put in prison? So I have an odd bunch of friends: one of them is Polish and he works at a call centre, the other is a slave trader and his name is Richard. We tend to meet outside our Polish friend's house to speak or to do "business" when need be (I run errands for Richard) and the other day that's where I got asked to kidnap an American. "That's strange" I thought, but nevertheless I went out and took the American from his house and carried him over in a sack over to our meeting place. I handed him over and sneaked off as soon as I could, thinking I was home free. But I wasn't. The police turned up all angry like. There were witnesses. Turns out a bunch of kids saw me giving Dick a Yank next to the telephone Pole.

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What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

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You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

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Why did Rainey fall off the swing? She had no hair.

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Roses are red, bushes are red, trees are red....i set your garden on fire.

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the reason why waldo is hiding from chuck norris is because they are playing hide and seek.

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Man, It's so hot in here that the horses name is friday.

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What did Grandma Sally give Little Timmy for Christmas? Herpes

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

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The funniest thing about this joke is that by the time you realise it doesn't say anything its to late to stop reading it

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Whats worse than a son killing his own father? His biological father finds him, 10 years later.

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Do you smell that? Sex and candy?

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If you call a quiz a quizzicle, what do you call a test? A set of questions or problems used as a means of evaluating the abilities, aptitudes, skills, or performance of an individual or group.

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Pickles are moist.

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What did the blond say to the ginger Stop drop and roll your hairs on fire

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whats the best thing about life? whatever the best thing about life happens to be!

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Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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Why did the submarine crash? Someone opened the window

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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If dogs hate cats and cats hate mice, than what do mice hate? Themselves.

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Q: What did the little jewish boy get for his birthday in 1940? A: The holocaust.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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