a man walks into a bar he suffer's bad injuries by Mad

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

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knock knock whose there? banana banana who? knock knock? whose there? banana knock knock? whose there? banana

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What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

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What happened when the football player couldn't get his Coke from the vending machine? He got angry.

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hey bruno ta quoi ds ta boite a lunch aujourdhui? DU SABLE CRISS DE POVRE!

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Q: What is the difference between a potato chip and a frog? A: Neither one of them is a flower.

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What's worse then spilling milk? Instantaneous Human Combustion

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what do you call lots of jews on a train? Call them what you want they aren't coming back!

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What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

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why do firemen wear red suspenders. I dont know because they go with there hat.

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Knock Knock Who's there May I come in? May I come in who? . . .What's wrong with you can I come in or not?

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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Yo mama is so old, she might die soon! - Louis

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What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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Why the hell does my sister shower in a swimsuit every time? Its not as if anyone is looking! ALRIGHT! ONCE ALRIGHT? ONLY ONCE! But then she hears the sound of my zipper ONCE and the shit hits the fan! Which is weird, yeah suuure she hears it when I pull it up, but when I pull it down and stroke it and moan? Nada!

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Chuck Norris has a chin under his beard.

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charlie sheen becomes sober.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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