Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. The first one says, "Pass the soap." "No soap, radio," replies the second one. "Oh, you want me to turn on the shower radio?" "Yeah, it's too quiet in here. I could use some tunes." The first polar bear turns on the radio. "Now pass me the soap, please," he says. The second bear passes him the soap, he washes his face and neck, and then they both get out and towel off. The second bear switches off the radio before they leave the bathroom.

Why did the police officer beat the black man? Because the Internet is able to connect a variety of different types of people together and the off-duty police officer was slightly better at the multiplayer game they were playing.

What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

your mom gave me head.....phones

I'm Ryan Dunn, and this is a 120mph car crash

Did you hear about the kidnapping? Well you should be very concerned because he hasn't been found in 4 years.

will you like this joke my sources say no

Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

Why was girl happy on the day she found out she wasn't pregnant? -It was her birthday.

So a magician was droving down the road and then he turned into a driveway!

whats worse than a baby impaled on your lawn... the universe being consumed by a giant albino ape with over sized testicles

an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

What is the difference between green and desert sage? About 20 bucks a gallon.

What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

Yo mama is so fat, she's bigger than a whale. I have two fathers.

What did the girl say to the boy? Hi.

A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

Why did the man crossing the busy road die? because he wanted to

Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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