what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Evicted.

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

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What is worst than a1000 baby's stapled to a tree? 1 baby stapled to 1000 trees.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

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What is black and goes blub-blub? A black blub-blub. Good job. What is red and goes blub-blub? There is no such thing as a red blub-blub, you idiot.

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What happens when 4 friends throw an egg into oncoming traffic, they hit a fire hydrant!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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what do you call a joke that makes no sense? a joke that makes no sense

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why do some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because they can be extreamly delishus and satisfying to eat. Why dont some people of all races enjoy American foods? Because then we would all be too big to fit on earth.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea but I don't see why it would want to cross a road in the first place. It is a chicken.

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop? zero if you bite it

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Guess what? AIDS!

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A white man went to the basketball court to play basketball and was confronted by a group of black men. They kindly invited the white man to play basketball with them and they had a nice day

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

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What's the best part of having sex with a twelve year old? Watching them cry when they prosecute against you.

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops