Why was the Japanese man unable to see? Because it was extremely sunny outside and he had forgotten to wear sunglasses.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

What did the very inquisitive poor black guy say to the very rich white man at the train station? Nothing, they didn't know each other. And they both had their iPods in. And they were at different train stations. And they were in different countries. And the black guy died 20 years ago.

What starts with P and ends with "oop" POOP

Q: Guess what my Mom and Dad did last Night on the Kitchen Table.... A: Had Dinner.

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

what did the guy think who woke up with his hands and feet nailed to a barn. IS THIS BECAUSE IM BLACK!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are productive members of society. -Canis

Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

knock knock whos there boo boo who why are you sad my wife has cancer

why did the man die? he was shot

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? One has a slightly darker skin complexion

An asian is doing math hw then his dad drives through the door

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

What is covered in red and has two legs? Half a cat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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