An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Scottishman walks into a bar. They had a good time.

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Your blood is red. Your bruises are blue. I have a gun. Now drag your carcass away from my residence.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Wait...what?

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Why do people insist on drinking diet soda meanwhile eating extremely unhealthy food? Because some people like the taste of diet soda over regular soda.

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Q: What's the difference between a black man from San Diego and a white man from Miami? A: They live in different cities, and in the presidential election, the black man voted for Obama and the white man voted for McCain

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Women's Rights.

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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A spanish comedian walked into a bar. He was on time for his act.

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If Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a child it would be fictional.

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A white man is running away from a black man. Because they are Playing tag. A gaming involving to touch the other person

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good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

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Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

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Why couldn't the blonde make ice cubes? Because recently she has been missing payments on the elictric bill because of economic hardships.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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Q: What do you call black guys running down a hill? A: Black guys running down a hill.

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VITAMIN C!

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Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

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A mexican and a black were in a cop car. Who was driving it? The Mexican, he was a cop and the black person was his assistant.

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How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

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How do you wake up lady gaga? You set her alarm clock for a reasonable hour.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Your momma's so stupid that she might not have graduated from high school, ceasing her ability to have an educated job. Now, she makes minimum wage and can barely feed her son.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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