What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A Wii.

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

What do you get when you cross a vampire and Adolf Hitler? A socially unacceptable and awkward hybrid of two unrelated, technically dead things.

Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

A man walks into a bar He is now in the emergency room suffering from deep lacerations to the forehead as well as a bloody nose.

What do u call a man who sells hot dogs on the street? A Mexican

how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a car.

How many women does it take to ski across the pit of lava? None, they would burn and die.

What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

what's worse than me fucking your mom she enjoyed it

BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing he died.

Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

A Haiku It Is This One Is Kind Of Boring Now It's Time For Bed

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

A: "How much rope does it take to hang a baby?" B: "I don't know, how much?" A: "The guy at Home Depot didn't know either."

little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

Why did helen kellers dog committ suicide? You would to if you had massive clinical depression.

If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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