Why did the crab blush? It didn't because crab's can't blush.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the man enter the fridge? He was hot Why is the man not in the chicken shop Hes in the fridge

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A guy walks into a bar and hears a someone crying. He asks the bartender who is crying and the bartender says "It's my goat. He's been crying since Tuesday, I'm giving a $500 reward to whoever can make him stop." So the man walks to the back and whispers something to the goat's ear and suddenly the goat starts laughing. The bartender was so amazed at what happened and says "Wow, thank you kind sir! Here's your reward money." and the man takes the money and leaves. The next day the man returns to the bar and the bartender says "Hey, ever since you made my goat laugh he hasn't stopped. He's been driving me nuts. I'll give you another $500 to make him stop." So again, the man goes to the back of the bar and whispers to the the goats ear. Suddenly, the goat start crying again. The bartender can't believe it. He asks "How in the world did you do that? What did you say to my goat?" The man says "Well the first time I saw your goat I told him a joke." "Okay, that explains why he kept laughing..." the bartender asks "Now, what did you say to make him cry?" The man replies "I told him..." Suddenly the goat escapes and goes completely crazy and kills everybody in the bar with his horns. Till this day no one knows what the man said to the goat.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's brown and seven feet tall? A door

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock Who's there? Boo AHHH A GHOST D:

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the alcoholic Indian do? Continued to drink and further worsen his people's stereotype.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Sally fall off a tree? The tree was a man wearing a tree costume and was sexually assaulting her with his branches. Sally fell off because the cops came and the man threw her down. The tree man is still on the loose. If you have any info please call crime stoppers.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Why did Lisa fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms... A: Knock Knock B: Whos there? A: Definitely not Lisa....

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What african eat for christmas Sand.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what would you watch during a scary movie? anything you want.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

.der era sesoR .eulb era steloiV .sdrawkcab nettirw saw ecnetnes sihT .yrgnuh m'I won dnA

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How do you prevent a drowning..? A: You don't throw the black man in the portwater

thumb_up thumb_down -1

How long does it take for a black woman to have a shit. 9 months.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what do you call an evening with richard? a waste of time

thumb_up thumb_down -1

You just sunk my battleship! 5,000 people just perished at the bottom the ocean in a war for pointless political reasons.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops