Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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(Played Basketball for 15 years) I TOLD YOU I'D QUIT WHEN LeBron Gets A RING

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what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

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Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Doesn't matter get in the van.

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What did the cow say to the other cow? Moo.

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Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

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why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

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What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

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"Knock Knock" "whos there" "interupting cow" "interupting cow who" "i have aids"

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ROMEO ROMEO WHEREFORE ART THOU ROMEO

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How many blodnes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Approximately 17. with the addition of 6 brunettes.

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Q. What goes "ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP, ninety-nine CLUMP"? A. Nothing does.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms! Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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A woman is carried out of a bar.

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XD Jackass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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