Why did the boy drop his vannlai ice cream?because Vannlia ice came.

With all due respect, I do underestimate myself, there is not a single person I know that has not told me that, but if I wanted to, I would not even had to make the effort to have you removed, hell I had to pull favors and owe people things in order to keep you safe. I could have said the rest of you, but had I not known you, had you not been one of my co-workers back then, I would not have gone to the extremes that i did, you are beautiful, but what does that have to do with anything? Do you think that if I did not know you I would go "that one is sexy, release her?" Even if I did, I do not have authority, I work for them.

This is an anti joke

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

full house should of been called black jack, because the Olsen twins started getting hit on at age 8 and didn't stop til they were 21

The man that loved birds so much that he played golf just to get a birdie.

What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

Two mice fell into a bucket of cream. They both promptly drowned.

If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

A dyslexic atheist stays up at night wondering if there is a Dog

Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

ive got it ive got ive got outsimers to tonight wow bim bim bub bub za za

Do you know what's sad about 4 black men driving off a cliff in a convertible? They were my friends.

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

What is a frogs favorite drink? Water.

What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

I have never liked jokes. They promote laughter, which is the music of Satan strangling hairy children and wildebeast. I'd like to thank anti-joke.com for their work in the struggle against hilarity.

roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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