How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Chrome won't stop crashing randomly F*ck Chrome

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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What do you call a penguin that hangs around in playgrounds? A paedophile.

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

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What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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How do you stop a drunk driver? With a minivan and family of four.

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What's Hitler's favorite beverage? Soda! Not Juice (jews) you asshat!

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What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

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There's an Irishman, a homo-sexual, and a Jew standing at a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community!

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Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

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Rebecca black walked into a bar. She was then escorted out because she is under-aged.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

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knock knock who's there jehovas witness... ...I allow them into my house for a cup of tea and a chat as I respect their religion

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What's hairy and sags? A ball sack

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What do you call a hispanic man hopping a large fence? A hispanic man hopping a large fence.

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What did the black man do when he found a bucket full of KFC chicken on the ground? He promptly looked around for anyone who might have bought it. After searching around, with no takers, he ate some of the chicken and saved the rest. He brought it back to his apartment and left it in his fridge, so he may later eat it as leftovers.

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I'd rather kill myself than commit suicide.

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Why didn't the man answer the Anti Joke? He had a severe mental disorder and was therefore incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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