What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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knock knock

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What did the astronaunt say to the doctor? Hola!

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whdid the cop say to the robber as he ran out of the bakery? I caught you bread handed

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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So I went to an audition, my friend said "break a leg" And then I did

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Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

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When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

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What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

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A dyslexic blind man walks into the bartender behind the bra

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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What's the similarities between a spoon and a duck. Both are not a lamp

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Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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Knock Knock The door's open, wipe your shoes off on the matt

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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