What did the murderer do to the dentist? Nothing, the murderer has served his time and is clean. But he did get his teeth cleaned.

How many lesbians dose it take to finish a pizza? One or unless she invites some freinds over.

What would Steve Jobs be doing if he were alive today? Dying.

How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

What did Kane Larkin get on his birthday? Cancer...

aodhan hearty

Doctor, doctor! I think I've got an ear infection. I best give you some medicine.

What looks like half an Apple? The other half.

whats the diffrents beetween a footballer and a hat nothing i lke chesse

What's green and smells like a dirty whore? A dirty whore

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we named a drink after you!". The grasshopper says "What, Dave?"

What colour is chocolate? Brown.

Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

Why are female badgers more attracted to the smell of cheese than male badgers? I don't know. Ask Bill Snodgrass

ring around the rosie ... your dead

What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

A tiger walks into bar. He orders a drink and leaves. The tiger's name was Tony the tiger," It was just a man wearing a costume for the cereal company.

Why was the blonde fired from her job at the M&M's factory? Her Masters Degree in electrical engineering made her overqualified for the position she had.

Why was the penguin popular? He cuts himself.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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