Why did the Titanic sink, even though people said it was unsinkable? Grit and determination.

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How does Justin Bieber remove a condom? he farts

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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charlie sheen becomes sober.

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Why is the sky blue during day? Because it would be night if it was black.

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a mother cow walks up to her three child cows. the first cow asks: "mom, why am i named rose?" the mother responds with: "because when you were a baby, a rose petal fell on your head." the second cow asks: "what about me, mom?" the mother says: "when you were a baby, a daisy petal fell on your head." the third cow says: "AAAAOOOOOOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAOAO!" the mother screams: "SHUT UP REFRIDGERATOR."

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The teachers cat is a fat cat and his name is ... why do even whant to know you stalker

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What's the difference between a black man and a large pizza? The black man is a human being with all of man's well-deserved rights, and the large pizza is an edible item. Furthermore, the black man, if adult and employed, has the propensity to feed a family of four far longer than a large pizza can.

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A boy goes into a Bakery and asks for a loaf of bread, the baker asks him if he wants a white loaf or a Wholemeal loaf, the boy replies, "it doesn't matter i have my bike outside"

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I have a phone, Don't know where it's at, Forever Alone FAPFAPFAP

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Charles Manson is innocent.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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What's the difference between cat and a watermelon? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer. The other is a watermelon.

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What do you call someone like Sarah Palin? A tragic victim of America's flawed educational system. But hey! She learned one thing though! Russia is right in her own backyard! Oh wait that would be wrong unless her backyard stretched all the way across Alaska and the Bering Sea. So she didn't learn anything at all. OK she's just dumb

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You know what it means when a priest lays his watch down on a podium? Absolutely nothing

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The adventures of HAROLD THE MONGOOSE: Harry dug a hole. He did not like that hole so he dug a new one. He liked that hole so he did not dig another one. Harry slept on a rock. He did not like that rock. So he smashed it with a ham. Harry found a new rock. He liked that rock so he didn't smash it with a ham. Harry ate a snake. He did not like that snake so he regurgitated it. Harry ate another snake. He liked that snake so he did not regurgitate it. Harry encountered a bush. He did not like that bush. Unfourtianately for Harry, that Bush became president.

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas Cancer

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A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

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Q:Whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish funeral? A:One less drunk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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