A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

hwhy did the monkey fall out of the tree? he got shot. why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? he was nailed to the first one.

What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

roses red violets blue my name chad i stupid

How do you make a plumber sad? You murder his family.

Remember IRON MAN 3! Subscribe to www.prettypleasehelpmeforgethatpieceofshitmovie.com

How do you put elephant in refrigerator? Open the door, and put the elephant in

My life is a dream in of itself.. inception???

A guy named John wanted to finish his life. Now he is dead

96

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car and die.

A blind man walks into a deaf woman. He tries to apologize but she can't hear him.

Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

I may have Alzheimer's, but at least I don't have Alzheimer's.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

What did the Unicorn do with the Portal gun? Nothing. Neither of them are real.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

why couldn't the boy talk? Because he was dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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