thumb_up thumb_down +1

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the two homosexual dolphins do when nobody was around? They continued on their way because neither of them had met.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's one very bad way to injure yourself? Smashing your head against a metal surface

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the kid with no legs fall down the stairs? Because his dad pushed him...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

David shut the fuck up your cat has asthma and i dropped a weight on its little fucking head that pikey should of drowned it furthermore your sister looks like a greasy alien

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How did the little boy fall off his bycicle? Prior to this incident, a psychopathetic killer murdered his family. Therefore, to escape the killer, the boy got onto his bycicle in hopes of manuvering away from the threat. Since it was nighttime he did not notice the fault in the asphalt.( No ryhme intendid.) From flipping over his handlebars, he fell unconcious. Upon the killer spotting the boy, he sliced his head off and left the scene to not be spotted by police.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you call a person up to their elbows in a horse's ass? A: An Amish auto mechanic. (this gem brought to you by Designated Dale)

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what dyu call a jew on the moon? a problem. what dyu call ten jews on the moon? a bigger problem. what dyu call all the jews on the moon? problem solved.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

God made Coke God made Pepsi God made me, Oh so sexy

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An Englishman, an American and a Frenchman are standing on the side of a cliff. The Englishman jumps off the cliff. The American also jumps off the cliff. He is followed by the Frenchman. Suicide and depression are major problems in today's world regardless of nationality.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

thumb_up thumb_down +1

You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's the easiest way to get a cat out of a tree? Call the fire department and allow them to safely reach the cat and properly extract it from the tree while you watch from below.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Did you know him? Why the anonymous tip?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a black man walking down the street? Danger Approaching

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do you put elephant in refrigerator? Open the door, and put the elephant in

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops