Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a larger worm in your apple.

Yes, it's for the patiënt in the other room.

Mila Kunis is fugly. Said no one ever.

what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

one time when i bought a sonic blast they gave me a regular? size spoon and i was like this is a huge inconvenience.

What's the difference between a clever trick and a computer programmer? A clever trick throws you for a loop, and a computer programmer throws you a for loop.

What do you say when you walk into an optical? "Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?"

Why did Mexico enter the war? Because they were bombed.

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

What do Robbers Get for Christmas? Other peoples things.

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

what's better than winning the special olympics? -not being retarded

what did the man say to the other man when he saw a dinosaur look.

What did the truck driver get when he ran over my cat? A pave low.

Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

"Whats that boy? Timmy fell down the well??" Bout time

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. And that's when I found out my Uncle Ted was a cross-dresser.

What did the POW say to his captor? I do not want to be waterboarded.

what do you call a woman with cancer wearing a wedding dress? a shouttellcock

what do you call a farm without animals a house with a big yard

Two clowns are walking down the street The first says, "Whats better sunshine or rainbows?" The second says nothing, then casually picks up a brick and beats the other clown to death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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