This guy dies and his wife gets him cremated. She takes the ashes home and lays them out on the table and starts talking to them. "You know that fur coat you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money. You know the new car you promised me? I bought it with the insurance money." Then she whispers, "You know that blow job I promised you? Well, here it comes..."

why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

Rebecca Black walks into a bar and gets shot.

how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

Have you read Shakespeare? Dunno. Who wrote it? Shakespeare.

.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice titttttss.

What is spiky and opens up wide? The Mouth…what were you thinking you perv?

Yo momma is so fat when she sat on the i pod she made the i pad!

a man walks into a bar and quickly notices a young lady having a drink. He sits beside her and asks 'why the long face?' 'My mother was raped by a horse.'

Hey you must be a parking ticket, because your yellow.

Why did the dead chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was dead.

A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

Q: Why did the Honey Badger cross the road? A: Honey Badger don't care!!!

The tall man says; How's theweather downn there? he's talking to smurf

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the fridge door and place the elephant inside. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the fridge door, remove the elephant, and place the giraffe inside. There is a party at the zoo. All of the zoo animals attend, except one. Which one? The giraffe, because he is in the fridge.

Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

Q: Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench. A: A bench is an object and a mexican is a human being.

What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

Why did billy have a bruse? Because he got smacked with a belt. -Louis

Q: Why was the mexican mowing the lawn? A: Because the grass was too tall

What did the teenage girl get for just sweet 16? An abortion

What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...