roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How do you name a beast who eat rocks and fly. rock-eater flying beast

thumb_up thumb_down +25

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats the first thing you do when your grandmother gets hit by a toaster? Buy a new toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? one dead baby nailed to ten trees

thumb_up thumb_down +25

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Don't tease the fat kids. They have enough on their plates.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

When is a door not a door? When your house burns down.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two buses.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

a black guy, a white guy, and an asian guy walked into a bar. It was an interracial bar, and served men and women of all nationalities.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I drove my Chevy to the levy. It was dry.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the brown guy say to the black person when he got fired? Nothing, did you think this was going to be racist or something?!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There once was a mountain climber. He loved to climb mountains. He had climbed all of the world's tallest peaks...except Mount Everest. So, one day he decides to climb Mount Everest. He takes weeks and weeks to prepare himself. He trains and trains three times a day till he thinks he is ready to climb Mount Everest. Climbing up it takes forever. It feels like it has been days in the dreary cold. Finally, he reaches the peak. It is a glorious occasion. On the way down, a huuuuge storm rolls in. He falls down a cliff and breaks both of his legs. The pain is unbearable. He screams and screams but no one hears him. Finally after what seems like days, a group of monks find him and carry him to their monastery. Chapter Two Once the man wakes up he thanks the monks for saving his life. They give him a room, food, and nice clothes. Every night in his room, he hears a banging behind his dresser. It is really loud and he is quite annoyed by it. The next morning he asked the head monk what the noise is. The head monk says " I cannot tell you, you aren't a monk." He hears the banging noise every night. HE asks the head monk every morning but he always says he cant tell him because he isn't a monk. So the climber decides to become a monk. After years and years of training to become a monk, he finally becomes one. Chapter Three So he says to the head monk, " I am a monk, so now can you tell me?" The head monk replies, " I can't tell you, but i can help show you. So he pushes the drawer back and reveals a little door, He gives the man a lantern and says to go through it. The man goes through the door into a little, dark tunnel, eager to finally find out what the noise was. He crawls for what seems like hours and hours and hours and days and days and days and days. He finally gets to the door where the banging noise is and opens the door. What he sees amazes him. Do you want to know what the banging noise was? I cant tel you, you aren't a monk!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

thumb_up thumb_down +25

whats brown and has a head? A: my penis

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops