wanna hear a joke? i dont

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Why don't sharks attack lawyers? Professional Courtesy

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Where does a jew with ADD go ? A concentration camp

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Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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What do you call a group of black guys riding on horseback? You don't. You call the cops first.

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mangos mandarins mushrooms mustache :{

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i stole a monkey from a man in a yellow hat his name is george now his name is i hate you

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Ruff, hi, ruff ruff, we are both dogs ruff ruff, ruff ruff, ruff!!

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Knock-knock. There is no reply. The burglar makes sure no one is home and breaks into a side window. After stealing some precious jewelry and family valuables, he exits through the same window.

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Why couldn't Jimmy have his birthday party at the park? Because little Jimmy passed away several months ago from the result of a vicious genocide committed by a man who didn't properly understand the affect that maiming human beings has on the friends and family members of the person; he was sentenced to jail for a fair and reasonable time for the punishment of the crime he committed in the past.

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What did the Big Chimney say to the Little Chimney? Nothing, chimneys are unable to talk.

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why did the mexican cross the road? To get into America. Why did the chicken cross the road? It was on its way to warn everyone that the sky was falling Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass. Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? cause he's Chuck Norris. What do you call a man who gets a check in the mail every month for doing nothing? A black man

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Aye I heard somethin about yo mom WAT!!!!!!!!! She a bop

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

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Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

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Your dad must be a drug dealer because I saw him in your kitchen snorting cocaine

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There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

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What does the fox say? Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding! Ringdingdingdingdingdingerding!

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whats worse than dieing in an airplane? jumping out of the airplane to save yourself and emediatly getting shredded by the massive engine you did not have the wits to see.

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Why did i write this joke knowing i wont get published? I don't know.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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