Two men meet at an office. One man says "why the long face?" Then other man says "I just had plastic surgery."

NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

OMG my mom just let me go to a concert in feb 31,2012 wohoo! LOL

Girls Lacrosse.

Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

Why did Chuck Norris fall of the cliff? Because he was pushed.

What happens if u call a black kid names? He tells an adult and u get in trouble

Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew. The pizza doesn't scream in the fire

yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

What's big and long? My dick.

1 tip for a flat belly so eating so much u fat bitch

If you're happy and you know it get a life

Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

robin, get in the car.

Were you born on a freeway? because thats were all accidents happen.

What's white, black and can't fit through a man hole? A nun with a spear in their head

PENIS that is all

why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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